We’re down to the Final Five on the second season of King of
the Nerds and the individual game has begun. Jack and Zack are the only two
fingers that remain from the hand of Midas and there are three Titans blocking
their path to the throne: Kayla, Brian and Xander. A clink drink toast is held
for fallen Titan Chris, but Xander is happy that Brian is still in the game. Outside,
Jack and Zack enjoy a celebratory sword fight on the steps of Nerdvana and are
soon joined by others. Zack tells everyone that at this point, they are all
Kings and Queens of the Nerds to him and that
no nerd is really better than any other nerd. Now I ask you, is that something
that a villain says? Nooope! Zack is an Anti-Hero.
When Curtis calls all nerds to the courtyard there are no
funny costumes, but that’s cool and I’ll show you why in a bit. It’s Live
Gaming Week in Nerdvana and the first individual Nerd War is called Nerdio
Kart. Not only will the winning nerd be safe from banishment, but they will
also hold the fate of a fellow nerd in his or her palm; the winner is allowed
to vote one person into the Nerd Off and the remaining four will vote in the
other. No other details are given about the challenge and the nerds are sent
back to Nerdvana with three hours of study. Xander isn’t sure what will be
involved, but is sure that his skills as a gamer will help him do very well and
Kayla, a car enthusiast, is also feeling very confident. Zack; however, is not
feeling so great. If they have to do any driving, he’s certain he will lose –
Because he’s never driven a car and doesn’t have a license!
Time for the Nerd War! See what I mean about the lack of
funny costumes? Tronified nerds is far greater! For this War, each contestant
will drive their own Nerdio Kart for 12 laps around the course. First place
snags 5000 points, second 4000 and so on, but bonus stars will light up around
the track that are worth 250 points each if the players can drive over them.
Each Nerdio Kart is in a randomly assigned position: Zach is in position one,
Xander is in second, Jack has third, Kayla starts in fourth and Brian is in the
final position. After the race starts, the players maintain their positions
until Xander bumps into Zack leaving a gap open for Kayla to slide into the
lead. With ten laps remaining, the bonus stars begin to appear, but Kayla has a
good lead on the boys – she totally laps Brian who has fallen into last place.
According to Jack, people are crashing more than Microsoft! And “curse his
bleeding heart”, Xander stops to make sure people are okay. With only one lap
to go, though, Xander has managed to get snuggled up next to Kayla in second
place and is relying on his collection of bonus stars to beat Kayla. Everyone
is relying on bonus stars to beat Kayla because she is so far ahead of the boys
at this point.
Bonus points end up not meaning a thing, though, because
Kayla has enough of them to win the Nerd War with Xander finishing in second.
It is because of his performance that Kayla shares the reward with him: they
will each receive a Telepresence Robot from Double Robotics worth $2,000! While
Kayla and Xander play with their new toys, Jack and Zack talk with Brian. They
know they are at risk of going to the Nerd Off and they are curious as to who
Kayla might vote into the competition. Actually, everyone is curious about who
Kayla is going to target. It’s the talk of the Nerdvana. As Brian says, the
“great game” is afoot; everyone is breaking off into pairs and trios to talk
strategy.
Xander and Kayla must have received a special dinner reward
in addition to their awesome Telepresence Robots because they are outside on a
patio eating and chatting, away from everyone else. Based on the assumption
that Kayla votes for Zack, Xander is pretty sure that Jack and Zack are going
to vote for Brian because Xander is a gamer and the dangling fingers of Midas
want to protect themselves during Live Gaming Week. If Xander and Brian vote
for Jack together, Kayla will have all the power because she will have to break
a tie. Later in the T.A.R.D.I.S Brian is talking with Kayla; for his game, it
would be ideal if Xander were up against Zack in the Nerd Off. When Brian
leaves, Zack enters and Kayla slips into the conversation that Xander may be a
viable candidate. Zack then walks in on Xander and Jack talking game; they
discuss the possibility of voting as a trio to put Brian into the Nerd Off to
avoid the tie. Then Zack tosses some firecrackers into the box; Kayla might
target Xander. Boom!
The next day, the remaining Titans are having breakfast when
Xander announces that he has created “Xander Bombs” throughout Nerdvana: If you
vote for him, there’s trouble for you. Kayla is free to vote however she wants,
but Xander has terms. Of course, Kayla doesn’t take this very well, she had no
intention of voting for Xander and she lets him know that he probably just hurt
himself more. Oops! Awkward! And for those of you who don’t know what this
whole “Leroy Jenkins” thing is all about, watch this video.
To the throne room! Things play out a lot like last week’sepisode of Survivor Cagayan; Kayla votes for Jack, (not Zack! – Kayla is more
scared of Jack’s brain), and the boys split their votes between Brian and Jack.
Since Kayla won the Nerd Off, she breaks the tie and she doesn’t stray from her
purple alliance, pitting Zack against Jack – the bird flip attack from the hand
of Midas will soon be upon the Titans, but who will remain in Nerdvana to give
the middle finger? Everything comes down to a game of Angry Nerds – yeah, it’s
just what you’re thinking, a life-size version of Angry Birds. In the T.A.R.D.I.S
is everything that Jack and Zack need to build a miniature version of the
structure they would like to use in the Nerd Off; their builds will be
recreated for them. (By the way, they totally use Big Brother music in this
show, same music that we often hear in Survivor too).
Before the epic showdown, the golden boys get to work
designing their structures. Both Kayla and Brian are helping Jack with
construction in the Midas Touch Attack War Room. Jack will be using the
standard Lego-building strategy of staggering blocks for optimum stability
while keeping his Nerds Balls spread far apart, (minds out of the gutter,
folks, minds out of the gutter, it’s the best way to phrase it!). In the ToR Room,
Zack is left alone to work out his block wall with only his friend Twilly, from
the Adventure Quest games, to keep him company and give him advice. Too bad
Twilly doesn’t really talk! Zack needs a Melissa-fied Yoda Backpack from Think
Geek, but I don’t even have one of those, nor do I possess the skills necessary
to modify a Yoda backpack. Maybe Katie could help me… Anyway, Zack is hoping
that the game will come down to shooting because, pardon the pun, he thinks he
will have a better shot at winning.
So how cool is this Nerd Off?
The game begins with Rock, Paper, Scissors and of course,
Jedi Master Zack wins the choice of going first or second – BECAUSE HE CHOOSES
SCISSORS EVERYTIME, COME ON, PEOPLE! Even if he doesn’t win King of the Nerds,
Xander is definitely the King of the Diary Room. lol So Zack actually chooses
to go first, giving Jack the advantage of watching him shoot the air cannon and
learn from his mistakes. Zachary! What were you thinking?! Did the gravity of
the situation get to you? You never choose to go first in a competition like
this! Anyone that wants to be on King of the Nerds should really watch a couple
of seasons of Big Brother and Survivor; you will learn a lot.
Both boys miss their first shots and do little damage to
each other’s structures. In his second shot, though, Zack scores a direct hit
against Jack, but does little to lessen the integrity of the build. Jack thinks
it was a lucky shot and in his second attempt, he manages a direct hit as well!
Against one Zack’s blocks. No points! Their third shots do some damage to the
walls, but neither scores a point, though Jack comes close. Zack’s fourth shot
is a miss as well, but Jack has finally switched gears. Instead of aiming for
Zack’s Nerd Balls, he’s going to shoot for the structure, which is was a good
strategy because it not only does good damage, but also puts him on the
scoreboard. Zack’s fifth shot is successful in scoring a point, another direct
hit then Jack evens up the score. Only smaller, well-protected, balls remain on
Jack’s wall and one of Zack’s balls is precariously close to the edge at to the
top of his.
Jack doesn’t even need to hit the ball to knock it down,
though; a direct hit to the wall is all it takes to bring down the would-be
Tyrant King of Nerdvana, Zack, who takes the loss extremely well. He will
always consider the nerds to be his friends, and hugs are shared by all. I
wanna give you a hug too, Zack! It kills me you’re not going to be in the
finale. You deserve to be there, most definitely, but as you put it – All of
you are Kings and Queens of the Nerds to me.
So we’re down to the final four and the finale episode of
the season is upon us! Who will win King of the Nerds? Jumping Jack the Giant
Slayer, Xander, King of the Diary Room, Brian the Bard of Bacon or will they
have to change the name of the show to “Queen” of the Nerds if Kayla wins the
right to sit atop the Thone of Games? Find out Thursday on TBS at 10pm Eastern,
9pm Central! And we have to Tweet Tweet TWEET to TBS to ensure they renew the show for a season three!
And for all you nerds that are fans of Reality TV, take some
time to look around the new Your Reality Recaps website! We cover all the best
shows and if you don’t see a show you consider to be the best, let Eric
(@RealityRecaps) know! He never has enough stuff to do. :) I’m also still
compiling my list of “Top Ten Things We Learned from King of the Nerds Season
Two” – Got something funny to submit? Hit me up on Twitter @thedolphinpoet and
I might add yours to the list! Until next time, stay nerdy, my friends.
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